Saturday, January 21, 2006

Why Haven't I Called You?

I have not embraced the phone like I thought I would. I am only talking to the people that I am most comfortable with. Every week I try to call someone someone in my family or a friend that I haven't called before. The next person on my list is a dear friend in Wisconsin - I just know she is waiting for my call even though we haven't been in contact for a long time. I also want to call Bonnie in Virginia, Shelley in Florida, Barb in Wisconsin (another friend in WI), just to name a few. In addition, I would like to try calling my new online CI friend, Suzie, in BC when she is ready. She was recently implanted and activated this past week and is still going through an adjustment period. We talk online and exchange emails and would like to try talking on the phone sometime, too, for practice. We'll have our IM's up, too, just in case we cannot understand what the other is saying. Using the phone is the most difficult thing to do for cochlear implant users, especially if we haven't used it that much. If I can just find a way to get past the fear of failure and reduce my stress level on the phone with sweaty palms and heart palpitations, I'll be fine. I just need practice. I'll call Steve if I want to try hearing on a certain program, etc. When people call me, I cannot answer right away because I have to hook up my cables or it takes me too long to find the "sweet spot" on my processor. But, I will get better, I promise, and make more phone calls. When I do, just keep it short and simple! I need time to process short and simple phrases and sentences. Also, loud is not always better. It just distorts the sound. Just talk to me in your normal speaking voice. Sometimes Brad has to spell a word for me if I'm having trouble but I get it eventually! It also helps if I know what the topic is.

Today is Jason's 25th birthday. It seems like it was just yesterday when we brought him home from the hospital. Where does the time go? I will call him later today!

I am still noticing new sounds and make a little progress every day. Yesterday I was listening to a song that I did not know in the car but I was able to catch some of the lyrics. That is progress for me because I've never been able to do that. I've always had to know the lyrics FIRST and then listen to the song. Some people adapt very quickly to their CI and do very well right away. Others like me adapt at a slower rate. It is not a "one size fits all" situation and everyone is different. It just depends on the auditory nerve and how much auditory memory a person has. Learning to hear with a CI is like learning a new language. I just have to trust God that he will keep a "window" open for me. Rome was not built in a day!

I'll close this entry with a quote from Dale Evans Rogers (Roy Roger's wife):
"God is bigger than any disability. Love Him, appreciate His blessings, and trust Him for the rest of the journey. He puts the rainbow at the end of the hardest trail."

My journey this far is living proof that God always keeps His promises. He is so good!

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